Nov
16
Breaking Up When You’re Still In Love


– Nobody’s gonna believe it though, right? I mean, when somebody says
it’s mutual, I’m like, “It’s never really mutual.” – Isn’t it, though? – Isn’t it what? Mutual? – Yeah. – Yeah. – When’s your flight, again? It’s the only thing we can do. – Well, we can wait like
a month or two and then just reconsider.
– No. I’ve done long distance before. It made us hate each other. I don’t want us to hate each other. Maybe I’ll visit in August. – Oh, that would be amazing! – On the other hand, maybe it’ll be easier if
we don’t see each other. – This job better be awesome – You made the right choice. (cell phone vibrates) – Hello. Yes, this is Michael. Oh. Well, I’m thrilled to hear that. No, no, I’m not in town right now, but I will start making plans
at the end of the semester. I’m looking forward to it. – Congratulations. – I am not gonna miss the
pee pee sheets though. – Shut up. It’s a mattress cover. Stop.
– What it is this? – You’re making it worse. – Aw, it’s cute. – No, it’s embarrassing. ♫ Come on back here ♫ Won’t ya ♫ I know that you are full of doubt ♫ I’m pretty sure that
we can sort it out ♫ Maybe I should I get a
new one I have to bring in some new guy home. – Why would you say that? – I’m sorry. That was… – It’s okay. – Thank you.
– Thank you. I got it.
– No. Come on. Let me get this.
– Nope. Tradition. – Ah, jeez. I left my wallet at home. – I got, I have, like, three bucks cash in my pocket.
– How could you? – I’m so sorry. I’m such an idiot. Please. I’m a modern day woman. I could treat a dude on a date. It’s a good way to see
if men are uncomfortable with strong women, actually. – I am not looking forward to dating. – Ugh. Dating’s the worst. – All you have to do is follow
Candice to a party again. – Hi! – Hi. – I’m supposed to distract
you while they flirt. – Oh, okay. Are you actually supposed to distract me, or is this just a pickup line? I’m very confused. – No, I’m, I’m supposed to distract you. – Oh, okay. Fair enough.
– But I did just hear the worst pickup line,
if you’re interested. – I apologize. Yes, I
would love to hear this. – Here goes. Excuse me. That is your color. – Gray? – Gray. It’s ridiculous.
– Okay. Sure. I mean, like, it looks gray. No, but it’s more of, like, a
chartreause or, like, magenta. That might be it.
– A chartreu… – Uber’s here. – All right. (kiss sound) Text me when you land. Safe flight. Honk. – Did you just honk my nose? – Honk. – I love you. – I love you too. (relaxing guitar music) Honk. – Honk. ♫ And I try to listen to my gut ♫ But I don’t have much to say ♫ Oh, tell me how do
I sort this out anyway ♫ And it doesn’t feel right like this ♫ And I start to try ♫ And I fear that I will miss ♫ Oh, come on back here ♫ Won’t ya ♫ I know that you are full of doubt ♫ But I’m pretty sure ♫ That we can sort it out ♫ – It’s just so sad what’s
happening over there. – Oh, yeah. Mm-hmm. (drum music) You don’t know the half of it. (smooth instrumental music)